Whilst pondering this evening’s Iowa caucuses I devised my favorite tweet in a very long time.
https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.jsIf you tell me you're voting for Biden I will know for a fact you have a Comcast email address.
— Scott Colby (@ColbyKnowsBest) February 4, 2020
When I finished chuckling at my own wit I realized I should do the rest.
Elizabeth Warren: Gmail
Bernie Sanders: Gmail, and you know how to use all the filters
Andrew Yang: Gmail, but you haven’t logged into it for three months because you communicate entirely through Discord
Pete Buttigieg and Deval Patrick: Office.com
Amy Klobuchar: Yahoo.com
Tulsi Gabbard: Yahoo.ru
Mike Bloomberg: Hotmail accessed through a Blackberry
Tom Steyer’s a tricky one. I like the guy, and I love the no-nonsense way he’s been taking shots at Donnie Dipshit, but the world just doesn’t need another politically inexperienced rich dude in a position of governmental power.
I’ve got it! Tom Steyer works, but you’re always sort of disappointed that you have to deal with him and you kind of can’t believe he’s still a thing.
Tom Steyer is an Evite.
I was waiting for someone to be Aol.com. Maybe that can be Bill Weld if he tries to run again.
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If John Delaney were still in the race he definitely would’ve been AOL.
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